The big news of course is that Brangelina confirmed that they are pregnant. This woman acquires babies like other people buy milk... While I am happy and excited for them I am a little concerned that the baby is going to be so perfect in every way that it will melt people's eyes. Maybe it is the second coming of Jesus? Does that make TomKat's baby Lucifer?
Speaking of Katie Holmes, she was spotted out and about buying coffee (not normal for a pregnant woman) Riding a motorcycle (not normal for a pregnant woman) and with an unusually small baby bump (definitely not normal for a pregnant woman)
Speaking of babies, Britney Spears took SPF (Sean Preston Federline for ya'll in the know) to a Hindu temple for some kind of cleansing ceremony.
First she was catholic, then kabbalah, now Hindu...mark my words..Britney Spears will be the next celebrity Trumpetcatist..I already sent her a starter pack with some cat shaped cheetos for SPF.
Speaking of celebrity Idiots, Paris Hilton caused a Paparazzi riot when she went for lunch and shopped on Robertson Blvd. What did she do that is so amazing? Well she did what Paris does best..
She sucked (a lollipop)
She pumped (gas)
She shopped (a lot)
and she posed (like an ostrich)
Speaking of people who are famous for nothing, Nicole Richie was spotted out and about looking worse than ever.
Why has noone done anything to help her yet? You can literally see her body eating its own internal organs...and that aint good. I'm thinking of setting up a Nicole Richie relief fund...check back for more.
Speaking of scarily thin people, Victoria Beckham appears to be the newest convert to scientology. First she was spotted reading a scientology book given to her by Katie Holmes and now she seems to be spending a lot more time with the newly brainwashed Ms. Holmes.
I wonder what they are talking about?
In the wild world of celebrity news it is comforting to know that not everything changed while I was away:
Janet Jackson is still fat
Sienna Miller is still an idiot
and Whitney Houston is still cracked out of her mind.
