The Unholy Trinity!

While all the other blogs, and pretty much the world, have been going crazy over Paris Hilton and Britney Spears becoming new best friends I have tried not to post about it because it reeks of such blatent desperation for publicity.

However, I couldn't hold off on posting this, the 3 most fame hungry people on the planet have united to create paparazzi heaven.



Lohan. Spears. Hilton.



Even though Lindsay recently accused Paris of pouring a drink on her at a party, stated she didn't care about Britney's divorce and even threatened to hook up with K Fed, now the 3 appear to be best friends.

Paris and Britney's friendship has resulted in Britney taking a nosedive in the style and dignity stakes after what seemed like such a promising start.

Exhibit A: Tacky Clothes and crotch flashing







Exhibit B: Bad hair extensions and boob flashing







Exhibit C: Leopard Print and yet more crotch flashing







So..fake friendships, fake fights and public nudity..all in the name of some publicity...it honestly wouldn't surpise me if these people "accidentally" fell in a giant vat of mayonnaise with their grandmother and then made out with her while spanking a horse just to get in the news...

Deja Vu?

This is an amazing spoof of Beyonce's "Deja Vu" performed by Tyra Banks when Beyonce was on her show.

My favourite part is the end when she orders her drink at Coffee Bean.

Now if Beyonce had done that in the actual video it would have been a lot more successful!

Cameron's new nose!

Here are the first close up pics of Cameron Diaz's new nose! She publicly announced that she would be having a nose job to correct her breathing after having broken her nose 4 times. She allegedly had the same surgeon as Ashlee Simpson.













What's the verdict? improvement or not?

IT'S HAPPENED!

TomKat are one!

But some intriguing facts about the wedding are emerging...

At the time of the wedding the couple were already officially married!

According to The Daily Mail:

"Yesterday it emerged that the couple had already married in secret in America. Cruise's agent Arnold Robinson said they had 'officialised' the marriage in Los Angeles before travelling to Italy for the three-day Scientology wedding, said to have cost £5million. For some, the announcement cast a shadow on the event at Odescalchi Castle in Bracciano, near Rome. It was criticised for being a stunt to raise awareness of the Scientology religion. Local priest Father Nicola Fiorentini said: 'It wasn't a wedding at all. It was just for publicity. I can't believe such an event was allowed to take place at all.' The Church of Scientology's influence was explicit throughout the event. Cruise's best man was the church's leader David Miscavige. A Scientology adviser was thought to have been at each table at the wedding banquet."

AND ALSO (AND EVEN BETTER) TOM TOOK A MALE FRIEND ON HIS HONEYMOON WITH HIM!

Cruise decided to take his "best friend" and head of Scientology David Miscavige with him and Katie to the Maldives while all the other guests were sent home to the US!

I have nothing to say! To be honest at this point why do they bother having the pretence of marriage? Why doesn't Tom just get on a plane with his "best friend" and a trunk filled with whips and baby oil and send Katie home to make sweatshirts in his basement? I'm sure Scientology could explain that one away...



Doesn't Tom look happy in the photo? and mysteriously tall...

Let's Kimono!

It's not everyday that a gaijin like me gets invited to a Japanese wedding. Excuses, occasions and opportunities to wear kimono are almost as scarce. Thanks to the awesome sensei's at my beautiful mountain school and Colin's conveniently wafu (japanese style) wedding, I was able to do both



I hadn't honestly considered wearing a kimono because I knew how difficult it would be. Getting your hands on a kimono is no easy task. Buying one is out of the question, as the ensembles can cost tens of thousands of dollars. At $500, renting one, which many young people do for their coming of age ceremonies (seijin shiki) was just as improbable. With just over a week left, I asked my JTE at the beautiful mountain school what I should wear. She acted as if there was no other option. "Kimono! Of course!"

As we sat chatting in the little tea room of the teacher's office, she very casually mentioned Colin's upcoming wedding, and how nice it would be if only I could wear kimono. "That would be good, wouldn't it?" The art teacher smiled, immediately offering to ask his wife, who, as it turnse out, is a master of kisuke, wearing and dressing people in kimono

"And I have many kimonos!" The couselor shot to the edge of her seat, clasping her hands together in excitement. "I can lend you one! I have furisode from seijin shiki, with beautiful, long sleeves It would look so nice on you!"

"Lucky, Melissa!" My JTE smiled at me over our cups of green tea.



Since I needed to be at the wedding hall in Nagoya (a good one hour train raide from Ena) at 10 AM, I decided to get my hair done the night before. Why, you ask? In Japan, only conbinis (conveinience stores) open before 10AM. For a hair stylist to come in early to do my hair, it would cost about 70$. So basically, it wasn't an option. Even if I had the money, I had to be at the art teacher's house at 7AM to get dressed. There was no time. So I got my hair done at 6:30 PM the night before(everything closes rediculously early too- that was their latest appointment) and slept hunched over my computer desk trying not to ruin it.



Despite the difficulties involved, wearing such an incredibly beautiful kimono was worth it. I'm so thankful for the never-ending kindness of everyone at the beautiful mountain school, especially the best JTE ever, Kachi Sensei. Arigatou ne!

THE END OF THE WORLD IS NEARLY HERE!!

A.K.A: THE TOMKAT WEDDING IS THIS WEEKEND!

Oh god, it's like heaven for me when Scientology celebrities get married! Everyone from Jim Carey to Jennifer Lopex and Brooke Shields have landed in Bracciano, Italy to gawp at the bride, groom and alien baby princess in the ceremony of the year!

Tom and Katie have been photographed all over Rome and have started taking baby Suri out with them!!! Is it wrong that I have a bit of a fascination with a 7 month old baby?

Trust me, one day she will be leading us all in an intergalactic war!



Katie looks amazing...



Tom looks squat and bloated...



I would quite like to nickname him "Flumpkling"...



Suri looks like she wants to escape...



And also like she is looking through my computer screen and deep into my soul...

Days of our Lohan

As usual Lindsay Lohan has had an eventful few days. First, she was photographed in London minus the wrist bandage she has been wearing for the past few weeks, revealing scars on her wrist. This has provoked some media outlets to question whether Lindsay has become a victim of self harm, or even a suicide attempt.



Lohan also chose to reveal some other aspects of herself and go out AGAIN not wearing underwear, for uncensored pics visit DListed

Then she had a slightly-too-long smooch with ageing fashion designer Donna Karen at a party in London...



It was then revealed that Lindsay will star as the new face of Miu Miu, and will shoot the campaign in London this weekend.

Finally GQ listed Lindsay as their "Obsession" of the year and celebrated this with a raunchy photoshoot and interview in which Lindsay appears very sarcastic.







INTERVIEW EXTRACT:

We met Lindsay Lohan in the garden of the Chateau Marmont hotel in Hollywood. We had a margarita. She had a…beverage.

Can we tell people we’re doing this interview in the men’s room at Yankee Stadium?
Yes. And tell them that we’re dating.

Does it make you sad that celebrity magazines never write about you?
It does. I really wish they would do more. I’m trying to become friends with all the cool famous people, the ones that go to clubs all the time—try to get into those tabloids a little more.

Tell me about an average day in the life of Lindsay Lohan.
It starts out with a 5 a.m. hike through Runyon Canyon to watch the sunrise. Then I go outside, and I try to find the paparazzi. I go down to Robertson Boulevard, try and search for them, find them, and bring them food.

And then what do you do at night?
Well, of course, I’m sitting at the computer all night.

Have you ever read anything interesting about yourself on the Internet?
No. I wish they’d be clever and make something up for me.

There’s some interesting stuff about you. Irocman39 in Skokie, Illinois, says you’re the “smokinest woman on the face of the earth”—
God bless him.

—and that he wouldn’t kick you out of bed for eating saltines.
I don’t eat. Don’t you people know? It’s all about anorexia and bulimia nervosa.

After computer time, when do you go to bed?
No later than 9:30 p.m.—ever. On a good night, it’s eight fifteen.

Dear god, more happens in this girl's life than happens to me in an entire year! Trust me, she is headed for Tara Reid status faster than you can say "firecrotch".

Ena Update: Fall has Arrived!

Beautiful! Lovery!

Dusk in the mountain top town of Akechi, a newly acquired tributary of Empire Ena.

I am much more than a geisha chaser. I am an Assistant English teacher. Behold, the fruits of my labor!

Kana is a third year junior high school student, which is the equivalent of 9th grade in the US. If you can't read it, click on the image and a larger version will pop up. (^-^)

KAWAII! How cute is this? Written by a second year (8th grade) student who does not like a lovery boy named Kazunori (^_<)

These are just a few of the smile-inducing journal letters my Beautiful Mountain School students write me every week. Although it is optional, most of them try to write at least once a week, and many even write three times a week. I'm always excited to see a huge stack of letters waiting in my mailbox when I visit, and spend more time writing back then I do preparing for class (>o<). I've learned so much about my kids through these little letters, and they've learned a lot about writing! The improvement we've seen is incredible, both in their vocabulary and sentence structure (although is obviously still far from perfect). Having the opportunity to write about anything they want, without the pressure of being graded, keeps the students motivated and keeps me up to date on everything about them, especially since I don't get to visit as much as I used to. This connection to my students, and the relationships that it has fostered, is what makes being an ALT worth all the hours of absolute, brain-numbing boredom.

Maybe Nicole Richie isn't fat inside after all...

Nicole Richie has hit back at claims (including the ones on this website) that she may have recently had a gastric surgery bypass reversed. She stated on her official myspace page:

"So i gain a little bit of weight, and im acussed of having a gastric bypass surgery reversed? Its pathetic of Page Six to insinuate i have done this. Anyone that knows anything about this surgery would know that legally, you must be AT LEAST 100 pounds overweight to even have the surgery done, and is a serious, life changing procedure; not one to throw around as a joke or a rumor. Ive given a statement I am in the process of putting on weight, and that should be enough. Its a shame to hear that instead of hearing supportive words, someone needs to spin it into some negative, absurd way"

Nicole was later spotted at a McDonalds Drive Thru casually eating amongst throngs of paparazzi flashes.

I'm sorry but I'm not buying it, something dodgy is going on...what kind of person needs to see a nutritionist to understand how to gain weight? The way she has spoken about it you would think she was trying to discover how to fly or how to turn a piece of coal into a ferrari...gaining weight is pretty simple...you EAT.

Next maybe Nicole will teach us all how to breathe or blink...one can only hope...





This was Nicole's reaction to the gastric bypass rumours



Classy.

Misoekai: Miyagawa's Fall Dance

Kimitomo 君友 peeks out demurely from behind her gold-speckled fan. The extravagant silks, colorful kimonos, flowery hair ornaments and hauntingly beautiful make up are only part of a maiko's beauty, and impressive as they are, the true allure lies in her child-like innocence.

As a geiko,　Kimina 君奈 no longer relies on the flashy kimonos or ornate hair ornaments. She has attained a level of skill that speaks for itself with every graceful movement.




Harumi　春美

Kikuryuu　菊柳 perfroming a traditional dance in which awamochi vendors take turns pounding rice cakes as they perform various acts. Awamochi is a type of rice cake that was popular during the Edo Era and is still made today.